Friday, 28 August 2015

Have you ever been compared to someone else?


I know most people can relate when I say that you have been compared to someone else by your parents, teachers or anyone right? If you get a bad grade, parents will be like '’why can’t you be like such and such they got this’’. If you get a good grade it will be like '’why didn’t you do better than this’’. It does not matter what it is parents will always be like
'’why can’t you be more like him/her?’’ '’you need to study more so you can become better than him/her’’ '’you need to do this to beat him/her’’ ''why can’t you be more like him/her’’ and the list just goes on and on.

Dear parents, when you compare us to others we feel like others are better than us and that we are not good enough. It gets us down and it's not nice. Everyone is DIFFERENT and you are asking us to become something we are not and it hurts. Everyone is different and beautiful in their own way. 
I know all parents do it because they have a good intention but I think there are other ways to tackle this problem rather than attacking your children without realising. This actually makes them think '’they are not good enough’’.  
Parents, this actually hurts and destroys your children inside and you do not see it so please stop comparing us to others. We are all different, we all have different talents and we are all unique.

Parents DON'T ACTUALLY REALISE THEY DO THIS AND THE EFFECT IT HAS ON YOU (so you have to make them realise). Parents really want you to do excellent and succeed. Parents push you to become better and better each time, they just want you to improve yourself. However the way parents say things becomes hurtful. Some parent’s make children feel like they don’t care and they aren’t good enough however this is not the case. It is just how they handle the situation. They actually love you loads and want you to be better than everyone else because you’re their child. 

So if your parent is guilty of doing this then sit them down and confront them nicely. Tell them what they do that you do not like, give them examples and tell them how it makes you feel. They might be in a habit of doing it so tell them each time they do it and eventually they will stop.

Has this ever happened to you? How did you deal with it? And what was your story?
Let me know by commenting below.
xxx
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12 comments

  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  2. Omg! I feel like you were just describing my dad ,I remember growing up and he wold be like "take a look at miss A ,she's always this and that ,why can't you be like that" but that was many years ago,and i've come to realise it's one of the things involved in parenting .but I love them to death. So glad I stopped by because I enjoyed reading this. Great post! By the way I love your henna pictures. Very very pretty.

    www.stylenbeautylounge.com

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    1. Awww!! Thank you soo much for your kind words and thank you for sharing your experience! I appreciate it a lot -Much love <3

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  3. The thing is they do not mean any harm, they just always giving (in their mind) some good examples. The key is patience and some good talk from where every person stands.
    Great post. :)

    www.yellenah.blogspot.com

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    1. I agree. Everyone should talk about their problems because talking solves most of the problems that we create ourselfs. Parents mean no harm but children may have bad thoughts like 'they are not good enough for parents' however by talking they both clear this up :) So talking is really important. Thank you for taking the time to comment hun <3
      xxx

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  4. I know that they don't mean to be harmful, but some comments as those that you've mentioned can really hurt, specially if you're feeling bad yourself because of the bad grades,a bad competition whatsoever.
    I sat down with my mum and I told her that I had enough, I've always been compared to my brother because he's a really hardworking man, and despite he wasn't the most clever, he's working on what he studied, and my parents always remind me that, that even though my brother didn't have the most amazing intelligence, he achieved what he wanted by working hard, and the tell me that I have to look up to him and work harder because I'm more intelligent and I can go further. My mum understood what I was feeling and now she doesn't tell those things to me anymore.
    Really nice post xx

    selenaponcestyle.blogspot.com.es

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    1. Thank you for your kind words and thank you for sharing your experience.
      I'm glad you had the courage to talk to your mum because most people feel too scared to talk to their parents so it's really nice to see that you have that bond there with your mum. Parents never want to hurt us and they do it unintentionally, but once we let them know then they stop because they don't realise how it makes us feel so it's all about talking to one another :)
      xxx

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  5. When i was a child my mum use to do the same think to me and she always use to put me down unintentionally. This was many years ago, but now as being a parent i remember never to act the same way with my child.

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    1. That's just the thing parents never realise they are doing it. That's it, I bet we'll all do something that our children may not like and that cycle will continue but no one ever wants bad for their child. :) xox

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  6. This has made me think about why I am always comparing myself to other people. My parents did this a lot throughout my childhood maybe that's one of the reasons I do it to myself, because it was drilled into me. A very thoughtful post :) xx

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    1. I'm glad this post made you think :)! I hope you stop comparing yourself with other people in time because, you are amazing, beautiful, and unique and you should embrace it :)
      xox

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